Bereavement

I remember crying when I found out I was pregnant with Oliver, I had a six month old at home at the time and I was scared!  But time was flying by so quick, and before I knew it we had a bizarre 14 week ultrasound that started me on the journey of losing my baby boy. By 17 weeks we discovered his kidneys had not developed properly, and he had a large cyst on the back of his neck.   We researched like crazy and tried finding similar stories.  We were offered three choices; termination (abortion), carrying until he passed, or delivering him alive until he passed. Those were our options.  Thank the Lord above for OPTIONS. 

I was handed a book called "The Gift of Time" written by Amy Kuebelbeck and Deborah L. Davis.  This book is filled with stories of parents who carry their pregnancies to term with unfortunate unavoidable outcomes.  I highly recommend this book to anyone going through a similar experience, years later I still find myself flipping through these stories.  

Oliver was kicking me, doing flips, his heart was beating.  I loved him.  I wanted to meet him, hold him, kiss him.  I wanted to birth him.  I was his mother. I am his mother years later.

I was able to birth Oliver alive and allow my husband and myself to say goodbye with good memories.  

My wedding dress was made into a burial gown, with a duplicate to keep.  

I got to pick out a spot for burial that would make it easy to have picnics at.  

We made as many memories as we could by going hunting, fancy dinners, and going to an orchestra.

I was filled with joy when he arrived.  Oliver was loved on for 2 hours before he left us.  What a beautiful way to leave this earth, to be in your mothers loving arms.